That inner voice.
You know the one, right before you do something meaningful, it whispers:
“Don’t mess this up.”
“Play it safe.”
“Maybe don’t speak up this time.”
I call it the unreliable narrator.
Some call it the inner critic. Or the negative self- critic.
Whatever name you give it, you know the voice.
And it’s not always telling you the truth.
I recently named mine Darlene.
For years, she told me my hand was something to hide, not something to own.
Tuck it away. No one wants to see it. No one will like you…
I thought I’d outgrown her.
But now, she shows up to question how I talk about unhiding.
Whether I’m really qualified to lead this conversation.
Will anyone find it interesting? Really?
My business coach recently asked me:
“Would you let a friend talk to you like that?”
NOPE.
She’s been living rent-free.
Holding me back.
Asking me to play small.
Encouraging me to hide.
Maybe your unreliable narrator is doing the same to you.
This voice doesn’t just show up in our personal lives.
It shows up at work:
In meetings.
Presentations.
Interviews.
Performance Reviews.
Team Dynamics.
It convinces us to hold back when we most need to step forward.
And when leaders believe it? It becomes culture.
You’ve seen it:
People stay silent instead of speaking up.
Teams withhold instead of collaborating.
Leaders perform instead of leading with transparency and authenticity—humanity.
It holds us back.
And it holds our workplaces back.
A fellow amazing speaker, Heather Hansen, shared a tool I’ve come to rely on: The Evidence Journal.
When that voice shows up, I write down exactly what it says.
Then, gather the proof that it’s not true—my wins, the feedback, the results, the resilience.
It helps rewrite the story and take the mic back.
When we stop letting the unreliable narrator lead, everything shifts:
People speak up with clarity.
Teams build trust instead of fear.
Leaders model courage, not perfection.
We show up.
And that’s when performance grows.
That’s when belonging becomes real.
That’s how we move from hiding to thriving.
I’d love to support you and your team if this resonates—whether personally or within your organization.
I work with leaders ready to move from playing it safe to leading with clarity, courage, and connection–so they can unhide and thrive.
Let’s explore how we can bring the power of unhiding to your workplace—starting with a simple discovery call.
Warmest, Ruth
P.S.
What’s something your unreliable narrator says on repeat?
And what’s one piece of evidence that proves it wrong?
Let’s start collecting the truth—together.
I’d love to hear your stories of unhiding—share them here.
Thank you for being part of the UNHIDING community.
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